Friday, February 08, 2008

Sea Spray

Tumbling and swirling, I take deep breaths whenever I can.

Save me, O God,
for the waters have come up to my neck.
I sink in the miry depths,
where there is no foothold.
I have come into the deep waters;
the floods engulf me.

"Be still" He says.
I feel relief, truly believing that those powerful words are spoken to the waves of my life the same way he spoke them to the waves of Galilee.
"Be still" he repeats.

The sky grows darker.

I am worn out calling for help;
my throat is parched.
My eyes fail,
looking for my God.
Do not let the floodwaters engulf me
or the depths swallow me up
or the pit close its mouth over me.

"Be still."
Again I wait for the waves to heed His commands. I wait for the wind to die down. I wait, and I cry, and I struggle against the deep darkness pulling me down.

Answer me, O LORD, out of the goodness of your love;
in your great mercy turn to me.
Do not hide your face from your servant;
answer me quickly, for I am in trouble.

...still, I know, but it's not working! The wind won't stop, the rain won't stop, this storm is not obeying you, and I can't reach the bottom anymore. I'm not strong enough for this. Won't you save me?

Let heaven and earth praise him,
the seas and all that move in them

All that move in them. All that move in them? I move in them. I'm drowning, but I'm still moving. Praise you?

"Be still" He says again, "and know that I am God."

Once He chose to calm the storm (Mark 4:35-41).
Once He chose to calm the man (Matthew 14:25-33).
Both times He asked, "Where is your faith?"

~from Psalms 69 and 46